Hello, I’m Christopher

I don’t know Billy Ocean / I don’t know the ocean floor /
I don’t own any albums / I don’t know anything / I don’t go to college anymore

  • City Parks – out Apr 6

    We’re putting the finishing touches to City Parks, my next book which you can pre-order now and will be out on Apr 6 2023. There will be talks and launch events of course. We’re looking to visit new cities this time, especially in Wales, Ireland, Germany, Europe, Australia and the US. So if you fancy hosting do get in touch.


  • Leeds

    Thanks to David, Jack, Lisa and everyone else who kindly organised and came to my Leeds Lido talk. I’ll be back at Hyde Park Book Club soon because it’s an amazing venue. Nice to meet Francesca and Caroline from Yorkshire Swimworks and Otley Lido’s re-opening campaign.


  • Chris & Cathy Live At 7.30

    Catherine O’Flynn is one of the best novelists in Britain. She’s also as obsessed with Birmingham as I am. So I was very happy that David Baldwin asked us both to do this night in Birmingham on Nov 9 where we will dress up like Kay Alexander and Alan Towers, show some amazing Brummie TV and say some funny things. It will be so funny and so fun. It’s part of Square Eyes TV Festival and you should buy your tickets now, come down to mac and join us.


  • Park Date Season Two!

    Thank you for all the kind words about the first season of my podcast Park Date! Eight episodes are ready for you to greedily hoof up through your nostrils or ears.

    Season 2 is coming THIS SEPTEMBER…


  • Live At Leeds

    I will be donning a pair of Speedos for this gig in Leeds on Sep 14 at the incredible-looking Hyde Park Book Club. Talking all things Lidos! Now where’s my LS6 T Shirt? Get your ticket here: https://www.seetickets.com/event/lido-chris-beanland-in-conversation/hyde-park-book-club/2396452


About Me

I’ve written books about:

1 the media

2 brutalism

3 love

4 swimming

5 dreams

Some things you could play at my funeral: thisthisthisthis and this. I’d like everyone there please …including all exes.

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